If you or a loved one have gone through a program in a drug or alcohol rehabilitation center, you know that much of the time spent in rehab focuses on preparing you for your move back home. This can be a dangerous and scary transition if you’re unprepared. Although throughout your stay in rehab you’ve accomplished many things and overcome serious and difficult hurdles, the toughest challenges lie ahead.

Returning home will make you want to settle into familiar routines, which would be a perilous mistake. When you consider that most relapses take place only weeks after leaving rehab, you can value the importance of making immediate changes to accommodate your new, healthier lifestyle.

Clean Up

If possible, have a friend or loved one remove all drugs, alcohol and paraphernalia from your home before you return. If this isn’t possible, recruit a sober friend or your sponsor to help you clean up as soon as you get home. There may also be other reminders or triggers of your former lifestyle in your home. Throw or give these away. Take the time to clean your home and make it comfortable and cozy. Rearrange furniture or change décor to refresh your place as much as possible.

Locate a Support Group

There are lots of sources for continued support for your life after rehab. Seek out an individual therapist you can meet with on a regular basis, find support groups with like-minded individuals, or start attending a local 12-step meeting.

Find New Friends

Immediately delete contacts of friends from your former way of life. It’s vital for those in recovery to make new, sober friends. The temptations and cues to use will drop if you’re surrounded by other sober people. To maintain your sobriety, it’s also important to identify and cut out negative or toxic people from your life. Recovery means creating a more positive and healthy life for yourself, and that includes choosing the people you surround yourself with.

 

Recovering from addiction will probably be one of the most difficult challenges you’ll ever face. This is a lifelong process and commitment and one that’s not without bumps along the road. But by taking it one day at a time, you’ll acquire strength from every passing moment of sobriety.

If you need help staying on a sober path after rehab, a licensed professional can help. Give my office a call today so we can schedule a time to talk.

For many people, drinking alcohol is something that is done on occasion and in moderation. Having a glass or two of champagne on New Year’s Eve or a cocktail out with friends is nothing to be concerned about.

For others, however, alcohol is not something one marks a special occasion with; it is the main event.

There are a variety of factors that can influence a person’s behavior when it comes to drinking such as genetics, biology and the environment. While the reasons one becomes addicted to alcohol can vary, what is consistent is a desire to keep drinking, despite being shown the devastation it is causing to their life.

Here are some of the most common excuses people make to keep drinking:

I’ll Lose My Friends if I Quit Drinking

Many a social life is based on partying and having a good time, and that typically includes drinking alcohol. This is especially true for younger people, who feel pressured to drink when they are around their friends. “No one will invite me to their parties if I refuse to drink.” “Everyone will think I’m weird or uptight if I’m the only one not drinking.”

While friends and associates may take notice, it’s important to realize that real friends will want to spend time with you no matter what. Those that don’t may have a drinking problem themselves and are uncomfortable around your healthy change in behavior.

Wine is Good for Me

While numerous studies have suggested consuming alcohol, red wine in particular, can benefit the heart and improve cholesterol levels, all speak of consuming in moderate amounts. In fact, a majority of US health agencies recommend no more than two drinks a day for men, and only one for women.

So, while some studies suggest drinking in moderation is good for health, the amount is really key. If you find you are drinking more than one or two glasses each day, you are no longer promoting health.

Drinking Relieves Stress

It’s no secret that stress can wreak havoc on our health. And no one can really blame a person if they want to somehow “take the edge off.” But alcohol consumption is not the healthiest ways to deal with stress. For those with unhealthy drinking behaviors, the one or two glasses needed to take that edge off turns into three, four and more. Stress and alcohol feed off of each other.

There are much healthier ways to alleviate stress such as meditation and yoga.

Quitting drinking is incredibly difficult, but, with the right support, it can be done. If you or a loved one has a drinking problem and is interested in exploring treatment, please contact me today. I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help.

Parenting is one of the toughest jobs in the world – if not the toughest. After all, children do not come with manuals or operating instructions. Looking for guidance, many parents turn to their own childhoods to pick up clues on how to raise children the right way, or at the very least, how not to raise them the wrong way.

But times change. Childhoods of just twenty or thirty years ago were vastly different than they are today. Modern kids, it seems, face more challenges and dangers thanks to the Internet and pressure from peers and the media to grow up way too fast. As a result, many kids turn to drugs and alcohol as a way to cope, fit in, and self-medicate.

While kids may not come with manuals, there are resources that can help parents raise them to be happy and healthy individuals and to avoid drug and alcohol addiction. Here are three things addiction experts want you to know:

1. The Longer You Can Keep Your Kids Away from Drugs, the Better

Numerous studies have confirmed that the younger a person begins experimenting with drugs and alcohol, the more likely they are to develop an addiction. For example, researchers found that nearly 40% of individuals who began using alcohol at or before the age of 14 developed dependence later in life, compared to only 10% who waited to drink until they were 21 or older.

This same pattern has been found with drug use. Each year of delay translates into a 5% decrease in risk of developing an addiction.

While the exact mechanism of this phenomenon isn’t entirely understood, what is known is that the brain is still developing well into a person’s mid-20s. Any change in structure or chemistry seems to make a child more vulnerable to drug and alcohol addiction later in life.

The takeaway here is this: The longer you can discourage your child from experimenting with drugs or alcohol the better.

2. The “European Model” Has No Validity

Some parents swear by what is called the “European Model” of drinking, where they allow their kids to have the occasional sip of alcohol at family events. The belief is that this teaches kids moderation and also demystifies alcohol, limiting its appeal and reducing the likelihood their kids will go “hog wild” later in life.

But this way of thinking is a relic of a bygone era. Today’s reality is that binge drinking is now a global epidemic. In fact, a survey conducted in 2011 found that a majority of European countries have higher intoxication rates among the young than America. In addition, European youth report getting drunk before the age of 13. Therefor the research concluded there is no evidence that a liberal drinking policy in the home reduced the likelihood of alcohol abuse.

Another long-term study of 561 middle school students found that those who were allowed to occasionally sip their parent’s beer or wine were four times more likely to binge drink once they reached high school.

The takeaway here is: while you may think you’re telling your children “drinking in moderation is okay…” what they may be hearing is, “my parents are okay with me drinking.”

3. Real Emotional Trouble May be Lurking Behind the Abuse

Many people experimented with drugs or alcohol growing up because they were curious, they’re friends were doing it, or they just wanted to appear cool. And it’s tempting for parents to assume that’s why their own child is experimenting now.

But it’s important for parents to understand that oftentimes, substance use is an attempt to self-medicate to escape sadness and depression. Adolescence is a time when mental health issues most commonly present themselves. For the first time in your child’s life they may feel anxious or depressed without knowing the cause or how to deal with these new feelings.

The key takeaway here is to pay attention. Your child’s substance use may not be about experimentation but rather a real cry for help.

If you suspect your child is using drugs or alcohol, speaking with a therapist can help both of you. If you’re interested in exploring treatment, please contact me today. I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help.

It can often be difficult knowing how to navigate a relationship that is impacted by addiction. Often, loved ones are told that helping someone with an addiction issue means creating codependency, and that the best thing to do is show some “tough love,” even if that means walking away.

But is this really true?

Is there a better way to relate to a friend or family member who is struggling with addiction? Is there a form of love besides “tough love” that can help us help our loved ones?

Recent research has found that loved ones can play an important role in an individual’s recovery. While loved ones can’t change their friend or family member, there are things they can change about themselves that will benefit the relationship.

The most significant thing a person can do is to become more compassionate toward their loved one struggling with addiction. Compassion is key to recovery as it allows a person to love a friend or family member without unintentionally condoning (enabling) their behavior.

Why Compassion is so Powerful in Recovery

When we offer a loved one genuine compassion, we voluntarily join them in their suffering and give them profound gifts that can be catalysts toward real healing and recovery.

Being compassionate means:

We See Them

Compassion allows us to really see our loved one and the suffering they are going through.

We Hear Them

All humans need to be heard, but those with substance abuse issues often feel they go unheard. Compassion allows us to talk less and listen more.

We Validate Them

To see and to hear are not enough, we must also let our loved ones know they have a right to express their pain, anger, sadness, or any other emotion they are feeling. Too often, friends and family members ignore or minimize their loved one’s suffering. Compassionate helps us validate the person.

We Comfort Them

Whether it’s physical, mental, or emotional pain, sufferers need to be comforted. Compassion guides us and helps us provide our loved ones with comfort through a loving touch, knowing glance, or a few kinds words.

It is also incredibly important to be compassionate toward yourself during your loved one’s recovery. Self-compassion asks that we treat ourselves kindly; that we see, hear, validate and show ourselves the same comfort we show our loved one. 

If you or a loved one is suffering with addiction and interested in exploring treatment, please contact me today. I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help.